Back!

Hmmm, it has been quite some days since i last updated my blog. I was so so tired for the past few days that i forgot to even on my dear computer. Well, i just installed a new software that changed my entire windows Skin to a brand new image. so cool! I felt so shag after the chionging session i had with debra and gang... The girls were like little mad ladies that went on laughing and runnning and stuff after they were drunnk... so funny... Hmmm, i am feeling a little moody now. Ha, i dun know why too....

I am feeling so mixed up now. I lost quite a lot of sleep thinking of relationships. Well, it is not that i am rushing or anything, but i just want to sort out my thoughts before i make any choice. Seeing as more and more of my frens get attached one by one, i felt strange that i am still single. It is not that i am some Despo that is in need of girls, but rather, there are just somethings if i do not cherish it, it will be gone sonner or later. Time does not wait for anyone, not for me at least, which is why i feel that i should made up my mind: to give up totally on weizhen and start a new relationship with angeline, or treat everything between me and angie as a dream and carry on waiting for weizhen. I am confused!

The time when i really confirmed my own feelings was during the period of time when i fell sick with fever. though it was just two days, but throughout that two days, she came over to accompany me and stayed over at my house. I felt so sweet and soothing during those two days for she provided the care and warmth i needed that time and it was also that time when i really told myself that she has to be the one for me. Despite the fact that she has to work, she still came and slept here with the risk of catching the fever has really moved me a lot...

The fact that angeline gave me such obvious hint that she is ready to start out the relationship with me made me nervous. It is not that i dun like her, but, i just felt something is not right. I am lacking of confidence. I went out with angeline today for lunch and some shopping. There was two times where i held her hand unknowingly and she did not reject my advances towards her. I felt so amazing each time i am with her, especially today. It is a fact that it is a mutual thing between the both of us that we like each other, but i guess it is me that is not doing the initiation. There has been a couple of times where she came over my house to stay over as well as brought me over to her house for dinner(meet the parents), things are so obvious now but i juz dun know why i am not doing anything... i am really damn slow...

I once told myself that for her, i would do anything, anything to bring her happiness and to be truthful to her always. I want to uphold my own promise and which is why i am trying so hard to forget about weizhen. Maybe i should just make myself clear to her. i dun wan to lose angie, never. I love her, i really do and i love her with my life.